When Can I Put Up My Christmas Tree?
December 1st for a real tree. A fresh-cut tree lasts about four or five weeks with good watering, and the math stops working if you start much sooner.
Count backward from the 25th. Buy on December 1st and your tree reaches Christmas with needles on it and a little dignity left over. Buy the weekend before Thanksgiving and by the 12th you're hosting a brown fire hazard with a star on it. The Court has seen the vacuum. The vacuum didn't recover.
This isn't only a joke about needles. A dried-out tree really does burn fast, so here's the useful part. Pick a tree whose needles bend instead of snapping off. Have a fresh inch cut from the trunk when you get it home, put it in water right away, and check the stand every day, because a new tree drinks more than you'd think. Keep it away from heat vents, fireplaces and anything else warm. If the needles start raining down when you walk past, the tree's telling you something.
Out-of-state tree lots may open earlier than this, and that's fine. Trees can stand outside in the cold for a while, in a bucket of water, thinking about what they've done.
Have it out of the house by January 1st. If you bought a fake one, it could've been up since November 1st, and that's a separate ruling.
The Ruling: Allowed from December 1 through January 1.
This ruling comes from a joke website. There is no court. The dates are our opinion, and the practical tips are ordinary common sense, so use your own judgment.